1.31.2014

january

I can't be the only person violently swinging back and forth between standing angrily at the window shaking my fist at the elements, and writing down nauseatingly positive messages to myself in an effort to beat cabin fever. ("So thankful to have a roof over my head, my family, hot coffee, and a warm blanket! #blessed." or "This too shall pass." - classic!) 

In all seriousness, wild optimism is actually not a bad strategy. It kind of gets you thinking of all the positive things in your life and then you get embarrassed about the fact that you were down in the dumps about having to stay indoors with your baby, and internet and Netflix and cereal and books and coffee. And by you, I mean me. Also, it's a fun game to turn every complaint into a ridiculous blessing in disguise. This is called reframing. Here, let's try it:
"The cold sucks! My house is buried in snow. January is the devil!"
BID: I have so many warm clothes to put on to stay warm. At least I don't have to leave the house today. January has taught me patience in the face of true adversity.

The only thing about wild optimism is that it's important not to shove it in other people's faces - especially people who are upset about something. This means you, people who try to solve other people's problems by commenting under their Facebook complaints! For the record, I am not either of those people - I try to save up all my complaints for my journal or my husband, and not on a permanent record for all the world to see. I just think it's funny when someone writes something like "Arg! My cat has been throwing up all night from swallowing a toy plastic alligator head!* The vet cost me $2 million! So frustrated!" And in the comments, someone always writes something like, "This too shall pass! You are so blessed to live in a country where there are vets. Hashtag blessed." And then you feel bad for the original complainer, because really, they just wanted to share their frustration, not get a sermon on contentment. But I digress.

*By the way, this actually did happen to our cat, Reginald Q. White. (Reggie White). But it was before the days of Facebook, so I thought it appropriate to share now.

When my sister Molly and I were in high school together, we would write notes during 2nd period and when we passed each other on the way to 3rd period, we would hand over our notes to each other. Each note contained a POTD (poem of the day) QOTD (quiz of the day) and AEDOTD (Albert Einstein drawing of the day). There was a poster of Albert Einstein in my Precalc classroom, so each day I would do a different themed Al. Ein. drawing - Cowboy Einstein, Disco Einstein, Abstract Einstein, etc.
abstract einstein

Then, we would include a nonsensical QOTD that one might find in a teen magazine:

You're at the mall with your friends, sipping an Orange Julius, when your BFF's mother's hairdresser stops you. She angrily demands retribution for stealing her boyfriend. You...
a.) give her directions to the nearest orangutan farm
b.) offer her a sip of your Orange Julius
c.) slowly pet the cat you've been holding the whole time and do jazz squares all the way to your car
d.) punt a potato as far as your steel-toed boots will allow.

Results:
Mostly As: you're sweet - but almost too sweet. Make sure you don't get taken advantage of, especially when vacuum salesmen come to your door. Those guys can be pushy. I mean really pushy.
Mostly Bs: did you leave your curling iron plugged in this morning?
Mostly Cs: Seahorses always get what they want.
Mostly Ds: aggressive elderly people on scooters 

Be sure to share your results on Facebook. And now, some super cute pictures of a baby in reindeer jammies and a dog who doesn't care about it.

 




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